Don't Mess With Texas...

Have you ever wondered why Texas is the only state that has a slogan that implies hostitlity? I have often wondered why no other state has jumped on that bandwagon. I think I can understand where the attitude that Texans have comes from. They truly believe that Texas is Gods' gift to humanity, and it should not be messed with. (A slight exaggeration might exist in the previous statement, but I'm rather confident it's accurate). But they are all alone in the spotlight and hogging all the attention that comes with hostile slogans. As we know, if you can draw attention to yourself, it's much easier to be successful in certain things. I believe the addage "All press is good press" supports my point. So in an effort to draw attention to some of the other oft forgotten states, I have taken the task upon myself to create hostility driven slogans in order to boost their exposure to society. The following is a list with a short explanation on why it just works:

"Don't Front New Hampshire"
It's about time that New Hampshirens take pride in their state and stand up for themselves! This one is trendy and can catch on quickly.

"Yo, Step Off Vermont, Son!"
Nothing makes a quaint skiing experience better than a little hostility on the mountain. Especially when you're sitting on the chairlift next to a Texan...

"Get Up Out The Grill of South Dakota!"
Bam! This one just hits you in the mouth! Plus there is no satifactory rebuttle to a statement of this nature. It just can't be done.

"Wy-You Staring At Me-oming"
Of course, when someone tells you not to look at something, the first thing you do is look to see what it is. I think the concept will do wonders for the state!

"Move Out The Way of The MaineTrain!"
With this one, I see a an old steam locomotive representing Maine barreling down the tracks. You better get out the way or you're gonna get run over. I really like the inherent aggressive nature of Maine, and I feel the MaineTrain is a good representation of said aggressiveness.

So there you go. Just a few ideas to chew on. Would I be surprised if each respected state used my ideas to boost their profile? Not in the least bit. Of course, I'd probably be willing to work out a deal in which both parties are satisfied, but I'll cross that bridge when I get there. For now, I'll just wait for the shift of power from Texas to the historically forgotten states. The MaineTrain is coming down the tracks, and nothing can stop it!